looking within

The first day of winter is cold here, I am glad. Yesterday morning was not so good for me – there was an issue about too much money and the company we use for our charge card business. The details are not worth typing but the vulnerable and helpless feeling that eventually caused anger was something that barreled into my quiet morning and set the tone for my day – some high tech contemporary garbage that intrudes into our lives and we have to find resolve with some automated robo system- you know what I’m saying!  

At some point, I just wanted to drop out of this 21^st century hocus pocus, virtual, click click, digital, plastic world – I wanted to isolate myself from this insanity. I thought of ways to retreat – liquidate, find a simple house in a simple town and detach. All of this happened the morning after I had been to Lafayette to buy a few paints and a brush – I became witness to and part of the Christmas shopping mania in a big city/town. I really could not absorb how much stuff is out there for us to buy – I don’t have the mental capacity for that amount of volume - anyway, thus began the perfect storm – let me out of this century!!

 

Well, I’m still here…and today is much better. I have my new paints, the weather is Christmassy, my house smells like evergreen and I’m in Loreauville where there is no mall or big box stores – only my chickens and my patch of earth that I have lived on for nearly 28 years. I think the point of all this rambling (and venting) is that we all go through these little dust storms but then it gets better, the dust settles. But during this storm I was forced to reevaluate some things and I reached a higher level – and that’s what is supposed to happen. Is that what we call wisdom?

Today begins the winter solace the full cold Moon will be out on the 28^th - hopefully in a clear cold winter sky. I find so much opportunity for reflection and renewal in the middle of winter as I watch how Nature sheds her luster and her protection so nobly - how she is brought to her bare bones and survives it, she gets through it only to reintroduce herself in spring. She does this each year. I suppose this is some kind of cleansing, purging that is necessary to grow and, because of my beliefs, I feel it is something I should follow – unlike man’s decrees; Nature’s laws are consistent and non-discriminate. So, I begin this winter with that in mind – the season to purge – both my thoughts and my things and in spring I hope I have looked within and am ready for the awakening of another opportunity to bloom.

I don’t know that I will write again before Christmas so I wish you pure and pronounced moments during this holiday season that will become soothing memories in the years to come – moments that find you outside looking at the Christmas sky, moments that include hugs and warm smiles and moments that find you alone in a cozy chair stopping to think about yourself and what is really important while welcoming this starkness that is winter. For it is this nakedness, that allows us to find some answers exposed there against the bareness and beauty that is Nature.

Happy Christmas.

Walden

 

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keeping it local

As I write, Elizabeth and I have been home for two days and the suitcases are, mostly, unpacked and the laundry, mostly, is done. Whew! I remember the days of family vacations and coming home with 7 suitcases of clothes to be washed, groceries to be bought, souvenirs to sort, and five small kids to see about. This was nothing like that – only myself and one little girl, ahhh. A bit poignant but, physically much easier.

 Anyway, my thoughts are all rattling around in some incoherent pattern right now – this trip was colossal and, for me, profound.To reference my mom, travel is the best education of all. I think I have made discoveries about things that have bewildered me in the past and I know I have grown from it. I have come back as a broader thinker and with a bigger heart, and that’s always desirable. I have seen so many aspects of society on this trip – from the working poor in New York City to the “old money” in New England and all in between and along the peripheral.

a cafe

Things are very different in the Northeast than here in the South. Some of the things, I have to admit, I prefer and other situations perhaps not so much. I prefer the resistance to corporations there. Many of the people in New England towns revere their heritage and therefore continue to support their communities; they do not give their dollars to the chains, they buy services and goods from their neighbors – it is a beautiful thing to see. The local diners and cafes are crowded; they are places where you know the owners and the food, for the most part, is not trucked in from yet another corporation, it’s grown by a neighbor or purchased from a local business. It just feels right.

just someone's house along the sidewalk of Concord

part of Thoreau's heirloom garden at The Old Manse

 As we traveled further north into Vermont, this phenomenon became even more apparent, these guys are serious about keeping it local. Elizabeth and I never saw a bill board splattered with propaganda, golden arches, Wally Worlds or anything “big box”. Instead we ate at Helen’s Place in Concord MA and met Helen and sat amongst the locals and absorbed their culture and understood the value of “heritage” a bit more. We bought our books at the local bookstore and shopped for (locally grown) produce at a Main Street market – it’s what everyone did and was able to do because of the choices they have made. I was so fascinated with their efforts to keep it local and so stunned with the extreme and somewhat exclusive presence of corporate as I drove home – hundreds of billboards telling me what to do while taking my money out of my community.

flowers in Woodstock, Vermont

just someone's garden

a revolution

 As an observer, I have drawn a bit of a conclusion as to why this works “up there”. First, they seem to be committed to preserving their heritage and secondly, they don’t seem as driven to consume. They do not tear down old structures and build bigger ones, they reuse what history has left and redo with character and craftsmanship and creativity. I did not see signs with “land for sale” littering the towns .Actually, one of the locals in Concord told us of the efforts made by the state of Massachusetts to reforest. This was told to us as we were touring the Old Manse and looking out the window towards the old bridge where the shot was fired that began the American Revolution – it was explained to us that then, the landscape was clear and you could see into town, but since the reforesting, trees have grown and altered the landscape. What a wonderful thing to do – paths through the woods to walk and run on and green spaces to enjoy and share with your community (a community of both humans and small animals) right in the middle of town.  

Enough of this free flow of words. I don’t want to sound negative towards other places in the country but I did want to express how in awe I was of communities sticking by one another and supporting each other. Keeping it local is nothing but a win. I am as guilty as you, I have tags that do not say “Made in the USA” but this trip has raised my awareness level and proved to me that communities do not have to succumb to the big box stores and national chains – they can keep their money in house. I would be fooling myself to think I could immediately be 100% on board with “local” but I do know I can do better, one shop at a time.

Strawberry Fields Central Park NYC

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Let it be

If you just let nature take its course you always win. I have realized all too graphically throughout my life that this is truth. I really wasn’t planning on an entry today – so much to do when you return from a trip, but I was outside and I walked past my tumbling down and mostly rotten garden shed, a sight that can send negativity through my shallow worldly concept, when I noticed these  daylilies growing there so beautifully not minding at all that the space they shared was “unsightly”; they were going to bloom and  be beautiful; they were going to do what they were meant to do, because it was time, no matter what the environment, not any different than a dandelion that struggles and finds its way through the crack in a sidewalk.

 I am one who believes that Nature has all of the answers; we just need to be able to open our minds more to “see” and this daylily standing there so graceful and proud in front of the tumbling down shed allowed me to do just that.It was taking its course, regardless of what superficial manmade occurence was going on around it. I suppose that if we could be more patient with life, with our children, with our careers, with ourselves, we would realize that Nature will prevail and all will be what is intended; we will blossom, when it’s time, but never before.



The determination of the daylily took away the self-inflicted stress I was feeling – you know that anxiety when you come home after a trip – so much to do!!! –so I “released” and continued to walk through the yard to “see”. I saw how big and busy the dragonflies were by mid-June and noticed the figs were a bit early this year. I saw the zinnias standing there rigid and ready to be cut and put in a glass vase in my kitchen, I saw my mother's four o'clocks - seeds she scattered 27 years ago when i moved here, I saw the concord grapes that I am sharing with the squirrels and the birds and amongst all this glory of summer, strangely, I saw Fall; I saw the grapefruits and oranges heavy on the citrus trees and the pecans quietly growing in their little pods; they made me think of the cooler weather and the holiday season that follows and that felt good; Nature’s promise that life will go on.

I took a few shots just to give a visual on some of the goings on of summer and hope that you “see” and can “let it be”.

concord grapes for "sharing"

something beautiful that just "appeared"

beauty from my mother

promises

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Seeing only the beauty

As an artist, I have never been able to choose a favorite color and as a gardener, I have never been able to choose a favorite season, each offer their own unique gifts. Right now, in the height of spring, I am totally in love with this season. The honeysuckles are there in the woods and climbing on old fence pieces covering the area with their sweet smell and delighting the honey bees. The confederate jasmine is nearly pungent from the fragrance that swirls around in the gentle spring breeze and the gardenia bushes are budding and blooming and their fresh cut bouquets fill my kitchen with the sweetness of their scent and my mind with memories of my mother. Then there is the scattering of dewberries throughout the woods and along the ditches – sweet and wholesome treats from nature there for the picking. I have fought for the control of this landscape that is my yard for years and I have realized that that causes me stress instead of enjoyment. I would go outside and instead of noticing the beauty I would notice the things that needed to be done and I would feel sad instead of happy. Well, all of that has changed – the yard is of course still as it was but my attitude has been adjusted, as they say. It all started with my little garden shed. It began to deteriorate but no time to fix it and I needed it for tomato stakes, fish emulsifiers, clay pots, and Have a Heart traps, so I decided to just let it go and see what nature would do. Well, nature is doing what she does – she is reclaiming it. The vines are woven inside and out, the rains have begun to rot the roof, the dirt has found its way inside from burrowing little animals and there are nests of sparrows and wrens that have settled into the rafters. I love watching this power, this power that nature has. I also realize that what is happening to my little garden shed would also happen to my house and may one day. This natural display is occurring everywhere in my yard and for the most part I can keep things at bay with the lawnmower and my pruners but I do only what I can and enjoy the rest. Of course I remember Miss Sue and her yard – for me it was the most beautiful piece of property on the planet and it was so natural. Nature flowed and she enjoyed the show, choosing to notice only the beauty.

potatoes

hidden

memories

taking over

lantana carried by the wind

garden shed

yesterday

cute

miracles

a community

roses in the mimosa??

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Things that matter


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Lucy Hunnicutt
Generous Neighbor



Where is that place in life that you feel success? I don’t mean the superficial success of accumulations – for that habit is insatiable and never gives you the feeling I refer to here. I mean that feeling that you have done those things that move you forward as a person, those deeds that have placed you in the hierarchy of humanitarianism, something that gives you that feeling you have made a difference. Perhaps it is fleeting, perhaps it is just a sudden rush that you will remember and that memory will want to make you do it again – like a drug but without the negative side effects – I have had a few moments in my life when I have felt really good, lately they always involve my children and where they are in life. I suppose that would be the answer given by all moms. I have a personal moment when someone likes my art – either a painting or a column – and that, not the exchange of currency, is what gives me the rush, the green light, to do more. I think it all gets murky and dark when money finds its way into the equation. It is difficult to find those things in life that are pure – I am most successful when I look to nature and the arts, but this purity I write of is becoming more and more obscure.

 Action expresses priorities.

Mahatma Gandhi

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Walden

 

"This is a delicious evening, when the whole body is one sense, and imbibes delight through every pore. I go and come with a strange liberty in Nature, a part of herself. As I walk along the stony shore of the pond in my shirt-sleeves, though it is cool as well as cloudy and windy, and I see nothing special to attract me, all the elements are unusually congenial to me. The bullfrogs trump to usher in the night, and the note of the whip-poor-will is borne on the rippling wind from over the water. Sympathy with the fluttering alder and poplar leaves almost takes away my breath; yet, like the lake, my serenity is rippled but not ruffled. These small waves raised by the evening wind are as remote from storm as the smooth reflecting surface. Though it is now dark, the wind still blows and roars in the wood, the waves still dash, and some creatures lull the rest with their notes. The repose is never complete. The wildest animals do not repose, but seek their prey now; the fox, and skunk, and rabbit, now roam the fields and woods without fear. They are Nature's watchmen -- links which connect the days of animated life."

 From Walden  - Thoreau

new life...baby chicks

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September 28, 2010 - gifts

I could never pick a favorite color or a favorite flavor or flower, but I can pick a favorite season –whichever one is just beginning – that is my favorite. Fall is here and, for now, it is my preferred time of year. I walked through the woods today and I saw Nature’s complimentary colors  – purples and yellows in the fields,  and felt coolness in the air that reminds me of yesterdays, yesterdays that my mind has tidied up and made just right, memories to connect me to who I was that made me who I am.  I look forward to these autumn days ahead and hope that I can focus on their gifts and ignore the negativity that tries to seep into my day . I will make a conscious effort to enjoy hearth and home during this season of harvest and bounty, never taking for granted the richness of my life.

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