Time

my snowman from Berry Tales :)

I try to recall the details of early December of last year – what I was doing, what worries I had – funny, but I can’t remember much negativity. I know something was there annoying me, concerning me, but, I obviously got through it. This lack of recollection makes me think about time and its magical effect, its purpose, really. I think of the figurative concept of moving through time – it carrying you forward as it washes away the troubles and concerns, leaving behind the good stuff – like little pebbles on the beach after the tide rolls out – smooth and shiny and brilliant from a cleansing; that’s what’s left of December 2011. I think of the early days of last December and I feel happiness. The twins were about to embark on a wonderful journey then and I know I was filled with apprehension and worry, but now, I just naturally go to that place of happiness, omitting any negativity that was running parallel to the good stuff that went on and I attach myself to that state where I felt happy. Hmmm, those pockets of peace restore us and time protects us, perhaps time is Nature’s Prozac.

 

It seems time is a gift in many ways. It heals, we all know that - and it sometimes washes away the things that are not so pleasant, leaving behind those that are – those memories that we need to keep, the ones that allow us to go on in gladness, for we must go on. It’s built in, this spirit we have to move ahead, to get better and to look forward. Like I posted before, we all need something to look forward to, whether it is a big event like a graduation, a big move or just a simple moment like the green beans sprouting in the garden – something good to anticipate - that keeps us healthy and  makes us happy.

 

I suppose time tweaks our memories a little – those days of childhood were probably not as gleeful as we “remember” but those “photo shopped “memories give us happiness now and what could be wrong with that? The bumps and bruises will all heal and fade away and , hopefully, we will all be left with a rich golden resin that was our childhood, one that we somewhat mimic for our children. Time is our friend.

 

I write this because it is nearly Christmas; it is the Christmas that you will reflect on next year and in the years to come. These moments are so fragile and so over anticipated and in 2012, so over done – Christmas has become the biggest retail extravaganza in the world. We have come a long way since the gifts of gold, frankincense, and myrrh; now it’s diamonds, Apple, and Mercedes. I hope we can all disregard most of that hype and understand that those things will most likely be forgotten; time will not keep a list of material things. It will, however, help you to remember the warm wishes, the still and cold night when you look up at the vastness of the Christmas sky, the afternoon spent in the kitchen with a child, the smell of cinnamon and evergreens, the macaroni ornament from someone’s first grade year, and the fleeting moments with the people you love. Time will only leave behind that golden resin that was this Christmas.

 

b u

p s

 

the little things

It is the first day of December now. I am just a bit curious as to why the months fly like days. I ask myself if I am too busy. Maybe. But there is nothing to take away, everything I do must be done so I suppose I need to not worry about the hasty passage of time and just enjoy the quick views I get and be grateful that I have purpose; soon enough I may find myself with time on my hands and I wonder what I will do to fill those long sought after slots of day – something I have thought of throughout all of these days of raising children. Who will I be then?

 Life shifts and transforms – each experience carries you to another level – hopefully a higher one. I am so much richer now as a person and an artist for experiencing all that I have and for most of this richness, I thank my children, for they have taught me more than they know; I hope I have much more ahead to learn. Anyway, I go forward with this gift of today and hope that by its end I will have answered the questions I ask, helped those I could help, and enjoyed the moments I have.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Robert Brault

 

 

 

postscript:

I looked back on my weblog, back to 3 Decembers ago and found this post – and I am reposting a small part of it. It is something I think powerful to read again at the threshold of this season of contrast – this season that “celebrates” spirituality with materialism and consumption.

 

Christmas gift suggestions:

To your enemy, forgiveness.

To an opponent, tolerance.

To a friend, your heart.

To a customer, service.

To all, charity.

To every child, a good example.

To yourself, respect.

OREN ARNOLD

 

 

b u

p s

an early morning walk

I am here to post something much more delightful and positive than my borderline rant. I have asked myself if I feel better after saying what I felt and I am not sure I can answer that. This uncertainty tells me, perhaps not. I think I stepped out of character for that post and not being "you" is never a pleasant thing. So, I'm back...pardon the detour.

I am off this week of Thanksgiving and the weather here is perfect. I was outside early this morning picking satsumas and newly ripened oranges off of my trees - trying to beat the squirrels and the birds. I stood there within the grove the citrus trees made and broke the fast of the night - it was so wonderful, pure, whole food from my backyard. I have to say, there is not many pleasures beyond growing your own food. I suppose it is somewhere in our DNA - a survival tool that we are hard wired for. I heard yesterday that one component of well-being and good health is to have something to look forward to. Well, growing your food gives that to you along with whole food that is free from chemicals and filled with nutrients. Just a small patch of land can do big things for your health. Just saying...

 

While in the woods, I was dazzled once again by the cobwebs that extended over the paths - masterpieces in the early fall mornings with dew outlining their shapes and emphasizing their details – little Rembrandts of the night reminding me of chalk artist in today’s cities – working so hard to create, only to be dissolved by an inevitable looming force of nature.

The day rolls out like a tapestry rug – each hour offering something different than the one before, like the chapters of our lives, unfolding and delivering little pieces of art that delight us and then disappear into the morning light of the next day where, if we look with open eyes, we will see yet another masterpiece beginning .

Anyway…I hope this post is back to normal and I hope you can find something to look forward to whether it is a child coming home for the holidays or a trip you may take or a ripe orange in your backyard – and when you do, I hope you are thankful for the masterpiece that was delivered to your door and know that soon, there will be another.

b u

p s

 

 

 

sorry, just had to say it

 

I am up early on this Sunday morning and my emotions are playing tug of war - so I will write, I will try to sort it all out with words. This weblog is designed to be a place of positive postings – as I have said, it is my “Prozac” – it is a place I come to reaffirm the good things in my life and life in general, but today, I am being challenged with a reoccurring torment of sorts. I apologize, but I must deviate from my purpose.

This negative spiral downward began when I opened this laptop this morning. I have a love hate relationship with this computer. I love the accessibility of my friends, many I would have never connected with if not for this magical machine, and I love being able to look up information but the nemesis is the information that is force fed to me each time I sign in – I really don’t want to know all of that stuff – and I really don’t believe most of its sensation but it still affects me and I carry around its negativity like a ball and chain.

Like this morning – the headlines were “Driving America’s 85-mph toll road before the fun gets old” – well I knew that was south Texas so I skimmed the article and found this, “This strip, I realized, would soon lose its innocence. The state of Texas didn't build it as a go-cart track for gas-hogging Caddys. Austin and San Antonio are both booming, and the I-35 corridor connecting them shudders under the weight of extreme population growth. They built the 130 to ease the traffic pressure. It probably will, a bit, but it's also an open invitation to developers. That's some pretty country right there along the San Marcos River. The day is coming when South Central Texas will be one long urban megalopolis to rival southern California. At one end sits a sign that points visitors to the new Circuit Of the Americas race track, and at the other, the entrance to Interstate 10. TX 130, the fastest road in the U.S.A., heralds a kind of lost innocence.” – that leveled me, the hill country, soon to be corporate? For one, I fear that allowed rate of speed will be pushed to the limits of 100-mph and danger will set in and secondly, and what prompted this post, I’ve seen that strip of beautiful, authentic country and now, I predict greedy, non-caring developers will litter it with every chain known to us – it will look just like every town in America – chains lined up for “miles and miles of Texas”.

 I traveled a lot this past summer and from the highway, it all looks the same; I find that so disturbing. I can only imagine the ill effects of these big corporations to the interiors of these, once unique, towns. I know the population is exploding and we need to provide for that but why can’t each town and city make those accommodations from within – with character and distinction that is their own – why do we all have to look alike and why does every piece of land have to be developed? Have we lost sight of the importance of our natural landscape, of America the beautiful? (I suppose you expect to hear a violin playing in the background right about now because I am getting close to the “drama queen” border.)

 Anyway, I will stop here because, as I have said many times, I am not politically savvy and certainly know nothing about economics, I just know that I am always upset when beautiful country with history and distinctiveness is leveled by big chains and greed that are only there to fill their pockets and have no concern for the destruction of natural habitats and the heartbeat of that town.

I can't end before I ask, " Why don’t we just buy local?" I know it cost a few dollars more to shop local, but hey, how about we “buy less” locally instead of “paying less” for so much junk we really don’t need? I am guilty on occasion too, guilty of popping into Wal-Mart or one of the other chains – I feel so bad when I go into one of those places that used to be a farm or a place where the sun set or, heck, someone’s backyard – they do not care – they have no perimeters as to what cannot be turned into concrete, destroying the natural flow of the land, tearing down trees, destroying the beauty and running out the wildlife that has been there forever.  Oh and then, we get up in arms when a dislocated black bear or a coyote invades our “territory” or a raccoon turns over our trash – how dare it come into my space? Just kill it.

 I have no solution to offer and those of you reading this may not even see it as a “problem” but this is my space to vent and it’s obviously something that means a lot to me, so here it is. I am not writing this to be confrontational and I don’t really care to respond to anything, I write this to raise awareness – I just wish we could all maintain our originality and I see supporting local businesses as the only way to that end – if not, we will all be, if not already, cookie cutter towns with no character and our money will land in some far away place. And sadly, the art of living will be on the clearance aisle in Wal-Mart.

 

b u y l e s s

p s

 

art

Just a quick post on a busy morning... Today is our community artwalk - something I have been looking forward to for a long time. I have my little book ready today - Berry Tales - and I have some pieces of art to show. I have a cozy spot at our local bookstore, Books Along the Teche, and the weather is festive and perfect, but...I have a little problem. It seems my right eye is doing something weird and probably age related - it began with a floater and last night there was a flash. I am very worried and will see a doctor this morning. I am posting, not for drama or sympathy, but for obligation - an obligation to say to you how we should not delay our lives. We never really know what the next second holds. I am not trying to spread paranoia or create drama but this little (I hope) incident has made me realize that very thing, that sudden change, so graphically. Anyway, I am off to the doctor and I feel confident iIwill be okay but I am different now, I am in a state of more gratitude for all that I have in terms of "natural resources" and I want you to be too. I hope to be at the artwalk this evening with my little book and my family of snowmen.

b u

p s